Wanna Give Someone the Finger!

The first thing I want to talk about today is my ring finger on my right hand.  Or, should I say, my 'Former' ring finger....since I can no longer wear any of my dozens of rings on it!  The knuckle on this finger has taken on a life of it's own, and I really, REALLY don't like it!  Today it hurts.  A lot! So I'm gonna share.  About a year ago I noticed that my knuckle was swelling and it was becoming hard to get my rings on and off.  I figured, okay.  I've got arthritis in various parts of my body, including both thumbs, so it stands to reason that my fingers will eventually be affected. Problem is, it just kept getting bigger and was hurting quite a bit.  I mean, I already take meds for my arthritis (which doesn't take care of all of the associated pain and/or discomfort, but helps a great deal) so why was it hurting so much?  I went to see my Doc so he could determine if mayhaps it was a cyst or a chipped bone or something, and he deemed it good old arthritis. Crap.  So, deal with it.  It was about that time that I took the 1st picture here, back in September.

It quit bothering me and didn't seem to be metamorphosing, so I decided to have some of my favorite rings resized.  At the going price of gold and silver, it is a little pricey these days to go up 2 full ring sizes, but Chuck agreed that it was fine so I did about 8 or 9 rings.  Now, my ring finger WAS a size 9, but this knuckle now required a size 11 for clearance. My middle finger is size 11, so I figured that if my ring finger decided to have another growth spurt, I could always wear these rings on my middle finger.

This second picture was taken this AM, and you can see that it has, in fact, started metamorphosing again. This AM the whole thing is just throbbing and hurts the entire length of it, not just the knuckle. Guess that's what prompted me to finally write about it.That had been my intention when I took the 1st picture, but I never got around to it.  That's just a really big change in 5 months time. I think maybe I'll let Dr. H take another look and see if I can inspire him to snap a little x-ray of it....just for peace of mind....or something. 

The sad thing is, that I have a massive jewelry collection.  Well over 100 rings.  Seriously.  All gold and silver and gemstone.  A lot of them can't be resized 2 sizes, because of their settings.  And the only finger they will fit on is my left ring finger, which houses my wedding ring.  Lots of $$ tied up and just sitting there, but worst of all is the fact  that I dearly love most of those abandoned rings and it gives me a huge sad to not be able to wear them.  Ah, hell...enough sniveling.

Yesterday I went for my 'annual' eye exam.  It's been 2 years :-).  When we 1st moved here I went to Fayetteville Mall, to Sears Optical cuz they had a great sale on glasses happening.  What I found was an awesome eye Doctor!  She's amazing and SO thorough and just plain adorable.  So I continue to go there.  Yesterday, glasses were 50% off and because I am a repeat customer, I got an extra 10%.....sooooo.....when I was having trouble deciding between the purple or the cranberry, I decided to get both :).  I'm really sick of my current glasses (except when I want to read something) so it'll be fun to have 2 new and cool ones to wear.  (life's simple pleasures). 

But, I do have to snivel a wee bit more.  The trek from the parking lot, through half of Sears, to get to the Optical shop, just about did me in.  And the trek BACK to the parking lot DID do me in.  Holy Crap!  I sat in the truck thinking, what the hell do I think I'm doing???  Going to San Diego in 3 weeks.  Going to Alaska in 7 1/2 weeks.  I should be doing these things after my surgery!  Well.....I WILL be doing them then, too. But still.....I need to see my friends.  I can't wait to be together with Poolie and Terri T again!  And God knows, I desperately NEED to see Terri and Riley and Maggie and Emily and Timmy and Xander and....yes, even my SIL, Michael :-).  I just SO hate to be an inconvenience or imposition because of my freaking limitations.  I feel like such a wuss.  But the reality is, not one of them will make me feel that way.  In fact, ALL of them will make me feel like I'm the same old Yankee Chick and the same old Mom and the same old Grammy and it'll all be good!  Damn good!! So what the hell am I whining about?!?!?  It's just been over 3 years of this shit and I'm so sick of it!!! 

It's been exactly 3 years this month since I last rode my Susie, so I guess that makes it 3 1/2 years.  I first went to see the Doc about my severe hip pain whilst riding  back in September of '08. (but I wasn't giving up on riding yet!)  Holy cow!  Holy Moly!  Holy Crap!!! 

Now I want to write about Susie and I want to write about my antique booth, but this is long enough!  Hopefully I will get my butt back here and write about that stuff tomorrow!  In case anyone decides to come and read. :-)

Election Day in Alaska

Today is a big day for my family.  My awesome SIL, Michael is running for a second term for Borough Assembly.  Here's one of his ads.  I love that he is so well spoken, but then he wouldn't have been so successful in the radio industry if he wasn't, and certainly wouldn't have his own radio talk shows!  And that lovely voice at the end of the ad?  Yep.  My lovely daughter, Terri, who also has a great radio voice and used to do a lot of ads :)
https://www.facebook.com/video/video.php?v=2257025436426

Hope that link works okay so you can see/listen.  His opponent is  a lawyer that is a serious snark.  He even had a newspaper ad that stated one of the reasons to vote for him is because 'he is NOT Michael Dukes'.  He has taken pot shots at Michael because of his size as well as his adamant support of the 2nd Amendment.  Like either one of those things has anything to do with the local Borough government.  He's a low life scum.  Michael will win by a landslide.  Heh.

At 6:30 AM Alaska time, I sent Michael a text to wish him luck and let me know how many points he wins by.  LOL  He texted me back and said he & his supporters were already on downtown street corners waving signs.  Gonna be along day.....for all of us.  Sure wish I was there to help!  I would keep the donuts and muffins coming and the Lattes and Sludge Cups flowing. 

There is always something exciting going on with my wonderful Alaskan family.  Riley got herself new skates.  Custom ordered.

I am LOVIN the green wheels, but the main 'custom' part is the pink leather.  Pink and black are the team colors.  She saved her tips for EVer so she could order these, bless her heart!  Some of her team mates have this brand and others are drooling :).  Regardless, she got them on Friday and has been counting the minutes until derby practice Tuesday PM so she can seriously get her skate on with these new babies!!  Like her Mama said.....it must be as exciting as waiting to drive ones new car.  Hee hee.

I've had a couple people mention problems with my comments.  I wonder what's up with that?? Let me know if it continues to be an issue {via FB or email.  Time to run errands so I can get home and knit :)

Clearing the Clutter

Well, I started with my computer area and now I'm making a sweep of the whole room.  Cleaning out and attempting to organize.  I tend to 'accumulate' and I never seem to have the 'proper place' for some of my accumulations.  Of course, it was too easy to let things pile up while convalescing from 2 major surgeries.  Just trying to keep the kitchen and dining table looking decent, resulted in a lot of things ending up in "My Room" to be taken care of later.  Ha!

I have to be in the right mood to do this sort of thing, because a lot of 'stuff' just needs to be tossed and it's real hard for me to just toss stuff.  I tend to hoard......like my Dad did :). Today was a pretty good day for it.  But I also have a lot of good stuff that I can't simply toss.  I need to donate it, or box it up for a yard sale or something.  That involves more thought.

So far I have cleaned off the pillows and bears that were living on my nice oak rocking chair and I bought a foot stool, so I have a nice little corner in My Room to sit and read or knit.  I bought that rocking chair 19 years ago, so that I could be a proper Grandma and sit in it and rock Riley when she was born.  I think I did that 2, maybe 3 times.  LOL  It just wasn't comfortable to sit and rock in, but it works good now with a foot stool.

Now for the rest of the room.  My 12 year old Babylock Embroidery machine and the multitude of stuff that goes with it, takes up a good portion of the room.  It's crazy that I have it set up and ready to go on this big ass table in front of my huge bow window and I haven't even turned it on in at least 3 years.  But I'm afraid if I put it away.....I won't ever use it.  How silly is that?!?  The first few years I had it, I embroidered everything I could get my hands on.  I'm sure I got at least 1/2 a life time worth of use out of it! 

My sewing area is way too small, and I really need to put away all the embroidery equipment and make room for that so that I can have room to more easily work on quilts.  I'm far more interested in doing that than I am embroidering.  I've had a quilt in progress for Timmy for EVER that I need to finish, I have the pattern and fabric for a quilt for Riley, and a pattern all set to go for Maggie, plus many others....but those come first.  After my back surgery, I couldn't sit at the sewing machine and do all that reaching forward and such {therapists orders...plus it hurt like crazy} so I just lost my mojo.

Now the knitting fever has struck and I'm acquiring yarn and patterns and have no place to put it.  Well, I have lots of room for it, as we have a huge house, but I have no 'proper place' for it.  I won't even mention the stacks of books tucked here there and everywhere {cuz my huge bookcase is full}

Then there is my computer area, with printer, scanner, copier, fax machine and the dreaded Eagle Construction bookwork stuff!  AGHHHHHHH!!!!!!!  Because of my {boring} limitations, I am only really able to do a little bit each day.  And sadly, I have to admit, I have been dealing with my 'physical problems' for so long that in the past 3 years I have just spent WAY too much time uninspired and had no incentive.  Just couldn't make myself work on any projects, read any books or do much of anything.  It's been crazy!  I am coming out of it, but still have my days. 

If only...........But in the meanwhile, I need to TRY to make the best of what I have, where I am.  And I do try......but I'm lost without my family.  It's been 8 years this week.  It was supposed to be 2 years.  And that's all I'm gonna say about that. 

Where Do Your Loyalties Lie?

Friendship and loyalties......how deep should they run?  I've always had a problem with this regarding both friends and family members.  So quick to go to bat for someone dear to me.  Always too quick to stop and think first.  I just jump right in, defending, supporting, protecting.  I figure if I care about someone, then I should put my 'outspoken' self to good use when I think they are being abused or attacked or otherwise mis-used by someone.  A person should really think it over before getting out their "Poison Pen" {or, these days, their "Poison Keyboard"  LOL}  Because, when the dust settles, just who do you think it is that ends up getting screwed without a kiss, and left wondering........

The first time that I got out my Poison Pen was at least 35 years ago.  My Mom and my Great-Aunt Ethel got into it over something.  God only knows what, because I can't remember to save my life!  But Aunt Ethel was really, really good at stirring things up.  The more hurtful and hateful, the better.  I just remember that she had my Mom SOOOOO upset, that my Dad was about to step in and give Aunt Ethel a piece of his mind (which was totally not my Dad's typical scenario).  So.....I decided to take Poison Pen in hand and I wrote her a letter that would have scorched the Devil himself.  When I got done verbally butchering her for the issue at hand, I tossed in few more of her devilish antics for good measure.  End result?  She and Mom made amends, actually because of some of the things I pointed out in my letter. But Aunt Ethel would have nothing to do with ME til the day she died, several years later.

I really think that was the only family member involved but it has happened numerous times thru the years and my loyalties usually leave me with being the bad guy.  Odd man out.  Go figure.

One of the worst cases was actually a little different scenario.  In an attempt to aid an 'acquaintance' and offset a potentially dangerous situation, myself and a dear friend jumped in right up to our ears.  Round and round it went.  Tons of people involved, twisting and turning and dredging until the original 'cause' was lost in the shuffle and in the very end, friend and I were hung out to dry.  Eventually and ultimately by the 'acquaintance'!  WTF to the max!  Epic Fail..........

Another time, I apparently looked at a long time buddy (with whom I had much in common) cross-eyed one day and she literally tore me a new a$$-hole on the world wide web!  I have never been so humiliated, had such vile, hateful things said about me in my life! And such lies.  That was the worst part.  I'm so not perfect.  In fact, much less so than most people, but really........Okay, so I look back on that and, obviously, realize that this person was never a friend and a thing like that can make you start to look around you.  If you were me, would you feel 'set adrift' if close friends commiserated with you, but went on to continue their relationship with this 'buddy'.  Would you feel hurt to see them together?  Would you think that maybe they believed all the BS and doubted you? How would you feel?  If the shoe was on the other foot, I am the sort of friend that would tend to back away from the buddy for having been so cruel and unjust to my friend.  Probably gotten out my "Poison Keyboard" and made it worse.  But that's just me.  How deeply should the loyalties of friendship go?

I am quick to anger and quicker to hurt, which is a very bad combination, indeed.  I am also quick to trust, but I'm learning.  I need people in my life that I can feel good about and trust with anything and that I know I can count on.....always.  And I have that in my wonderful little family.  I am ever so blessed to have Terri & Mike and all of my wonderful grand-babies!  Without them, life is bursting with insecurities and uncertainty.  I DO have a lot of amazing friends out there, but I am learning that it is a rare, rare friendship that will ever be unblemished.  I am learning never to expect that of others.  It's just not the fair or right thing to do.  But my family????  They better toe the line!!  LMAO

BOONDOCK SAINTS DAY

Ahhhh.....the Boondock Saints! Where to start...

First, I will say right up front that some of you dear friends of mine will be appalled that I love these movies, these boys and what they are all about. There are serious guns involved and some very creative and down right delightful killings that go on in these movies. The MacManus Brothers are Irish Vigilantes and they kill incredibly vile and perverted and disgusting sinners, of the most horrendous kind!

My very own sweet little Irish Lass, Riley, introduced me to these movies while she was here this past summer. She had been telling me about them for AGES and couldn't wait to share them with me. One of the best things about getting together with my Riley is that we always stay up after everyone else has gone to bed, and she shares her favorite movies with me. We stay up into the wee hours eating chocolates and popcorn and chips, drinking coffee or Pepsi and Diet Vanilla Coke, curled up under a cozy afghan together sharing her beloved movies. She prepares me for the ultimate scenes, so that I don't blink and miss something! And she recites lines right along with the characters. I love it more than I can tell you! It has become our ritual and main plan of events in planning our visits with each other. The most amazing thing to me is that my 18 year old grand-daughter still considers me her best friend and likes to cuddle on the couch and watch movies and do fun stuff together. And we can also sit and drool over the same guys! Weeeeeeee!!!!

Okay, so back to Boondock Saints! Riley and Terri bestowed upon me the most awesome of Christmas gifts by sending me the movies. The Boondock Saints and Boondock Saints II: All Saints Day. And tonight I am going to officially introduce Chuck to these awesome movies! Riley and I watched each of them about 4 or 5 times, but I haven't seen enough. They are on my list of movies that I could watch over and over and over (along with all the Die Hard movies and Indian Jones, to mention a couple from my rather short list).

The movies are full of amazing music and I have put my favorite on my side bar, along with the "Prayer" they recite prior to shooting their victim. I love to have this playing when I am doing certain things at my computer and the best part is, it makes me feel like my Muffin Girl (Riley) is right here with me. The fun part is, Murphy LOVES it! When ever I play it, she comes running from where ever in the house she is; jumps up onto my computer desk and enjoys it with me. And well she should, since I named her for my favorite MacManus brother :)

This COULD lead me into how terribly I miss her....and Terri and Maggie, Emily, Timmy and Xander-Man. How my heart aches for them sometimes......most times. The light in my heart flickers so low, so often. It literally pains me to not be a daily part of their lives, as I once was. But things change. That is life. Shit happens, blah blah, yada, yada. I hate it.

BUT! Little things like the love of movies and music shared, fan the flicker into a flame and make it okay....for awhile.

Birthday's!!

First, allow me to wish my dear Timothy a HAPPY BIRTHDAY!! He is 10 today and ever so confident that as of today, he will {automatically :)} be more grown up and not so spazzy. He is so funny! He really is quite the comedian, not falling far from his father's "tree", so to speak. LOL

AND.....the day after tomorrow, on the 5th it will be XANDER'S birthday!! And he will be 5! Big day for this handsome man as well!

There are cupcakes for breakfast to be had, picnics and much swimming at the lake and special birthday cakes with a few gifts tossed in on the horizon!  I suppose they will have fun even if I can't be there, sniff sniff...

I Have Totally Lost My MInd

But! Whilst looking for it, I came across these photos I would like to share.

 Jenny Craig for Horses, anyone??  LMAO  Granted the first picture {which is one of my ALL time favorite shots of the Girls} was taken May 12, 2007.  Granted, at that time Dixie {Blonde Butt} was only 2 years old and not yet full grown but almost as tall as her Mama, Susie.  However, as you can see in this photo shot a month ago, she not only is a bit taller (perhaps half a hand) BUTT she is much rounder!  Dixie has definately become one chunk of horse!!

The second photo was shot during the trail ride we went on while Riley and Timmy were here.  I never did get to blog about it, mostly because I spent an entire week driving from there to here and back to there and here again!  The scoop on that is.....every year there is this John Shaddox Memorial Wagon Train that starts out in Harrison, Arkansas a week before the Rodeo of the Ozarks which takes place in Springdale {just a few miles from us}.  It's a pretty neat adventure and there are about 200 participants.  Some ride horses, like Chuck and Riley did, while others drive wagons and buggies and such.  It's quite a big deal.

Anyway, it's about 83 miles from Harrison to Springdale and each day they would ride 12-16 miles or so.  The day would start at about 6:30 AM, at which time everyone would drive their horse trailers, campers, etc. to the campsite for that evening, and a shuttle would take them back to the camp from the previous night where the horses would be waiting.  They would then ride to the new camp site, wash, rinse, repeat.  There were some really nice campsites.   Farmers and ranchers along the trail would make a field available with plenty of grazing and there would always be a stream nearby.  It would have been a lot nicer if they did it at a cooler time of year, but then it wouldn't coincide with the rodeo, which was the original intent. It is, however, a long HOT ride.  For the riders and for the horses. 

Riley had a great time riding Dixie while Chuck rode Susie {once she got over her case of 'saddle butt'  LOL}  And Chuck was bust fending off all the young cowboys that had a tendency to meander over Riley's way.  Hee hee. 

My day consisted of driving the Tahoe pulling the horse trailer to the next camp site and then heading back home with Timmy and Chuck's sister to gather 'supplies' or do laundry, shower, tend the garden, etc.. Then late in the afternoon we would drive back to horse camp and all spend the night and the next AM, wash, rinse, repeat.  It was an interesting week!

Take the Good With the Bad

Riley and Tim arrived just fine yesterday morning.  Their trip was pretty uneventful and they had no problems at all.  We had a great day yesterday.  Didn't really do anything special, but it was sure nice having them both here without too much other company or too many 'interruptions' :)

On a sadder note, my MIL passed away today.  Things were looking pretty grim yesterday and this morning and Chuck had been on the phone with his sister several times regarding her condition and changing plans we all had for next week and such.  His sister called back at noon, however, and MIL was gone.  Chuck has a very hard time dealing with death and expressing his emotions at times like this.  Even after 42 years I can't break thru that barrier. 

So, next week, rather than the Wagon Train Trail Ride with his sister and the kids, he will be heading to upstate NY for her funeral, then possibly back to Florida to help take care of her home and possessions. Sadly, he will lose out on spending several days with the kids, but it is what it is.

MIL would have been 95 in August and has a full life.  Always been pretty healthy and able to live on her own right up until about 8 months ago or so, when she did have to finally be placed in an Assisted Living Facility.  It was no specific illness that took her, but rather just that she was worn out.  And her time had come.  She didn't suffer; simply went to sleep. 

Hopefully tomorrow I will have a better post about the kids and some pictures to share.  For today, this is it.

SURPRISE! Or Not.......

So, I have been playing around over here cuz I'm tired of the limitations that confront me with my lack of WP.org knowledge and ability and am finding that I might just like it here for a change........or not. We shall see. Nothing is set in stone. I'm just gonna post here tonight and see how I feel about it :)

Having this time off from work, I have been able to get back in my kitchen with some time and energy and actually prepare meals, people! I love to cook, although I do admit to the act of doing it e.v.e.r.y. night for 40 years became a bit dreary and tiresome. The past year that I have been at W*M, working late hours, has left Chuck to fend for himself most nights so he is enjoying having real meals every night once again, as well. I've been sticking with old favorites, until last night whist chatting with my sweet Terri on line and she gave me the incentive to try a new dish. She was telling me about a new restaurant that we need to try when I go up to visit and that they make the best Carne Asada. Not knowing what that was, I looked it up, found this and made it for dinner tonight
It turned out delightfully delicious! The meat marinade was heavenly, key notes being the fresh lime and cilantro complete with the char broiled effect of my grill. Very Yummy and a keeper for sure!

It was a beautiful day here today, but I for sure felt in my 'mental element' as a Yankee Lost in the Ozarks! As I was flitting around town (well, hobbling, rather than flitting, as my hip is still bothering a bit. Whatever) thoroughly enjoying the 68 degree day I began to notice something. It wasn't sunny, but rather cloudy and very misty. Enjoyable temp, nonetheless! I was noticing, however, that I was pretty much the only person wearing shorts and a t-shirt. People had sweaters on. Some people were wearing jackets. WTF?!? I began to feel a bit out of place (which I am) and like people were 'looking' at me (which they were). LOL Kinda funny I think.

I was finally able to get my Leave of Absence packet from W*M late this afternoon, so tomorrow I will proceed to determine exactly which Doctor will take responsibility and sign it for me. Once that is turned in, my Short Term Disability should kick in and I'll be good until I see the surgeon on Oct 8th and start the process for the real thing. I am wondering if I should do this with the aid of an attorney, however. I suppose the Doctor can advise me on that from his experience. Any of you that have any insight, please feel free to share your comments.

I'm going to lunch with Victoria again tomorrow. We had such a good time last week and it was so good to be with someone that I have known for so long and so well. We caught up on kids, cats, dogs, mutual friends, old co-workers. It was all good and I truly enjoyed it. Last time we tried, I guess I just wasn't ready. It didn't feel right. Now it does.

I think that's it for tonight. I have some quilting to do before Chuck goes to bed and the sound of my sewing machine keeps him awake. Geez. For such a big house, there are no quiet corners! Mayhaps I could move my sewing room to the barn :) (or his bed......)