Here We Go Again...........

Packing up the motorhome and headed camping with Roy, Deb and the boys.  This time, I am not wearing myself out cooking all day to prepare stuff to take.  And I am not going to carry heavy stuff out to the motorhome and make 152 trips doing it.  (Chuck already has)  And I have already packed all of my 'just in case' meds for my leg spasms and sleeping :).  It should be much more enjoyable this time. All I have to do tomorrow is make a big batch of salsa (that everyone seems to love) and take a few things from the fridge out and I'll be ready to go.

I've still been without my truck for the second week.  The new engine for Chuck's van didn't come in until today and it 'should' be ready Friday.  Hopefully I will have my wheels back on Monday.  YAY!  I am just used to being able to come and go as I please and being stranded hasn't been too painful, but it's been a bit inconvenient.  My purple hair is fading and the silver roots are WAY over-exposed.  I am desperately in need of a fresh set of nails and a pedicure. I haven't been able to go the the fitness center to do my back and leg strengthening exercises (boo hoo).  Mostly I miss my weekly lunches with Victoria.  We talk almost everyday, but we have the most fun when we get together.

Here are a couple of pictures I took the other day.  Even tho I didn't dare get close enough to miss part of the house, thereby screwing up the composition, I am still pleased that the splashing of the little Mama Bluebird shows up so well.

There!  All clean!!  So cute to watch.  I love my bird bath :)

Attacked Again!

Three weeks ago, I was ruthlessly attacked by a horrendous hoard of Seed Ticks, left to suffer for many days from my allergic reaction to their teeny tiny little bites. Yesterday, it was poor Chuck's turn. The Chiggers got to him yesterday apparently, and he has been in misery ALL over his body.....and I mean ALL over! I got out the Cortisone Plus and gave him an antihistamine and he is doing much better....for now. But it will be an ongoing battle for awhile. It's amazing he hasn't gotten into them long before now. He's been very fortunate :)

Here it is almost the end of September and everyone is yapping about it being "Fall". It is currently 7:30 PM and 88 degrees! That is NOT Fall weather to this Yankee. Talk to me again in November. Real Fall hits here around Thanksgiving. LOL I'm sure we will get a couple of ice storms in January or so, but I will thoroughly embrace the 40ish temperatures before and after!!

Oh, and when I changed my template I lost my comments....which has something to do with my need to uninstall and reinstall the comment thingy I was using. I'll work on that another day.

A Video and Some Photos~Horse Stuff, Of Course!

Dixie Drinking Video
Originally uploaded by YankeeChick
Dixie just loves drinking from the hose {following a good shower from it, of course!}. Here's a short little video I took with my phone :)

She also is an "itchy" girl and you can find her scratching various body parts on the fence or tree or whatever else is handy.  I REALLY need to get one of her scratching her butt on the fence.  It's hysterical!


And I wouldn't wanna leave Puss Puss out (AKA Princess Esmerelda)She seldom gets published!

Brand New Day

Since my big ol' Pity Party the other day, I have received some awesome comments, emails and a couple of heart warming phone calls.  Friendship and caring......does a body good!

I also had an incredibly funny Googler reach my blog that day by Googling "butt fusion".  Thought I would die laughing.  Wondering if mayhaps it is someone about to go to prison and is afraid....oh, never mind.  Who knew it wasn't safe to talk about my spinal fusion in the same post as mentioning my horse being on her knees with her butt in the air???  When tracing the link back, this is what I found that the person had clicked on.  I must admit, it could pique one's couriosity....

Yankee-Chick

It was Dixie's butt, up in the air. She was on her knees, in the fresh mud, ... At that point I will know, most importantly, if the fusion has 'taken' and ...
yankee-chick.blogspot.com/

The 'thing' with my legs seemed to go away yesterday and so far today it hasn't afflicted me.  That has the potential of being a good thing because there is the possibility that it won't happen again....any more....never!  Or, it could be like other things and will pop up when I least expect it.  I'll pretend it's gone for good and go on about my business :)

Of course, it's rather hard to get on about my business when my Tahoe has been abducted by that Man and his dog!  Sadly Chuck's van died Friday and he has been having to use my Tahoe.  Originally, our mechanic thought he could have it fixed by yesterday or today (Thursday) to the tune of about $1000.  Gulp.  But, as of yesterday, after further investigation he found out that the van needs a new engine.  SO....that won't be done until NEXT Wed or Thurs and will cost more like $3500!  BIG gulp!!  He did toy with the idea of getting a new van, but figured that he'd have to shell out more than that for a down payment and then we would have another monthly payment to make.  Besides, he and that van have logged over 160,000 miles together and he seems to have some strange sentimental attachment to it. 

One good thing about it is that it keeps me from going to town and buying fabric and yarn and stuff.  Of course, it also keeps me from buying groceries and running errands for HIM but it works out okay. I have started knitting.  Not sure if I mentioned that here or not, but I have and I am working on a couple of projects, but always think of more and want to get the yarn for it now!  So, I'm finishing up a couple and getting a couple of sewing projects out and will be getting into them real serious here in the next few days.  Providing, of course, that I don't find myself in the midst of another Pity Party.  Those are very detrimental to the accomplishment of any projects :(.  But I shall think positive and remain optimistic.  I insist!

  For now, I shall go play with uploading some photos and will probably bore you with those later. 

I Need A Pep Talk

I really do, but I don't suppose any of you can help me. 

Today I am feeling extremely negative about a multitude of things.  Mainly involving my defective body.  I'm tired.  Tired of feeling like a mere shadow of my former self.  The self that used to always be so physically active; riding my King Quad 4-wheeler across the tundra, up mountains, down mountains, thru mud flats for hours on end.  The self that helped pour concrete, build trusses, hang sheet rock and whatever else it took to help build houses.  The self that used to run and play with her grandchildren, swinging them thru the air, piggy back rides, riding bikes, running thru the rain.  The self that was just getting comfortable enough with her sweet Susie to ride across a field with wild abandon, giving Susie her head and letting my own head be blown free of all thoughts except the delightful freedom one can only experience with a trusted and loyal friend such as she.

Some days I sit here and wish I had never had my surgery.  Other days, I write how glad I am that I did and today I look back on that entry and wonder WTF was I thinking that day.  Days like today, I want my freakin life back!  I do not feel grateful for anything.  It has been almost 6 months and just when things seem to be getting better and just when I realize that I can do something that I haven't been able to do for a long time, something 'new' develops that just throws me for a loop.

I started out pretty good today.  At least I was up until about an hour ago.  We had just had a serious rain shower, which we are in desperate need of.  It had about stopped when I went to the kitchen to get a cup of coffee.  I had just finished scrubbing one of the bathrooms, fresh and clean with just me and my bucket of bleach water.  I was feeling pleased that I had accomplished that for the first time in eons.  I scrubbed the tile floor, the door, the tile on the walls (it runs half way up and there is wall paper on the top half) and the vanity.  The muscles in my back protested a bit, but I'm okay with that.  THAT is to be expected, especially because I'm still not supposed to be doing things quite so exuberantly. So.....while getting my coffee, I looked out the kitchen window and saw the most hysterical sight!  It was Dixie's butt, up in the air.  She was on her knees, in the fresh mud, stretching her neck under the fence trying to get to some weeds on the other side.  I grabbed my camera and away I went.  She heard me, and of course got up.  Didn't matter.  Halfway to the fence, my left leg suddenly went out from under me and down I went.  Thankfully, I kept the Nikon tucked safely under my arm and it didn't go flying thru the mud and grass!  Well, I landed on my knees....cursed myself for not staying focused on my walking and got back up.  Stood there for a minute and looked at Dixie as she peered sheepishly at me over the fence.  OMG!  Her whole face, from her ears to down under her chin, was covered with mud!  As were her legs from her knees down.  Lucky me, I took a couple steps before pulling my camera out from the safety of my underarm, because down I went again.  Then I was pissed.  Came back in the house, wiped myself off and here I am.

This has been going on for.....oh, about 3 weeks or so.  Much leg pain in general, but also this crap of having one or both legs just go out from under me.  I will feel a sharp pain in the front of my leg, like someone stuck a big ass hat pin in the front of the joint and boom....the old leg wants to give out!  Sometimes it only happens once; sometimes it is only one leg; sometimes it is both and sometimes it just keeps on keeping on!  Since the first part of my Physical Therapy involved me learning how to walk properly again, I have been 'trained' to remain pretty well focused on every step I take, so I really haven't 'gone down' until today.  Before I started this entry, I Googled "leg problems post lumbar fusion".  During the past 6 months I have Googled many things relating to my surgery and each time it amazes me at what I find.  There is always good and bad.  And you all know how it is when you Google something.  One page leads to another and another, until you've actually covered several different issues different from, but still related to, your original Google.  Today I read a lot about 'nerves healing' and 'nerve damage'........again.  But I did find out that a lot of people have similar issues after this surgery.  I also found out that sometimes it is due to "failed" surgery and they have to have it redone.  It is also sometimes due to permanent nerve damage occurring at the time of surgery.  But, hey!  They have pills for that!  Fuck me.  Some people have it and as they continue to heal {which we must remember, boys and girls...this will take up to 12 months!} it does go away.  And on and on the possibilities go.......beCAUSE........everyone is different!!!! 

I don't wanna be different!  I don't wanna live with pain any more!!  I WANT TO BE ABLE TO MOVE FREELY ABOUT THE CABIN OF LIFE LIKE I USED TO!!!!!!!!!!

So many times I have started to write a post like this and either deleted it or just never started it.  I think of some of my friends that have gone through so much worse.  SO much worse!  Like our dear K-Lo and sweet Purple Chai.  I think of them and then I look at myself and wonder who the hell am I to complain about what trivial shit I am going through?!?!  But....today, I am complaining.  And I am in no way undermining what these brave and courageous, beautiful women have dealt (and are dealing) with.  I guess I just need to have my stinking pity party, once and for all.  I sit too long, and I hurt.  I walk too long, and I hurt.  I stand too long (like 30 seconds) and I hurt.  WTF??????  I will get up out of my chair after sitting here writing this and my back will hurt and I will have to walk probably 20 or 30 feet before I can straighten up....maybe.  Maybe not.  I never know.  I'm already getting achy from sitting this long, so I'll finish up and go put a load of laundry in the dryer and load the dishwasher and then I'll need to sit again....only in a different chair.

Good God! That is certainly quite enough whining for one day, what say?  All I can do is muddle along until the 29th when I finally have my 6 month check up with the Surgeon.  At that point I will know, most importantly, if the fusion has 'taken' and if all is healing properly.........or not. And if these leg problems will go away.....or not.  If not, just shoot me, because I will NOT have  another surgery!!!!  NEVER!! 

Camping Trip and Me, Me, Me,Me, Me

We took our motorhome out of moth balls and went on a camping trip with our neighbors and good buds, Roy & Debbie for the long holiday weekend.  We left Thursday afternoon and came home yesterday {Monday} early afternoon.  We only went about 30 mile from home, but it was a great campground on Table Rock River and our sites were right on the sandy 'beach' of the river.  Sweet!

Their 2 grandsons, Corbin and Noah were along {as they live with Roy and Deb} and Saturday was Corbin's 9th birthday so we had a party for him.  Their daughter & her hubby and youngest daughter {5} also came.  It really was lots of fun.

In my last post I was sounding off about how well I am doing post-surgery.  Well, that changed in a big-ass hurry.  After helping the farrier with the horses Wed. AM, I proceeded to spend the rest of the day gathering stuff up for the motorhome, doing laundry and shopping for the trip.  Thursday I spent the day cooking for the trip and trying to load stuff.  I made potato salad, brisket, salsa, birthday cake, beans, guacamole and other dips.  The motorhome has actually been at an RV place, as we have been trying to sell it, so it was EMPTY.  Not set up with all the basics like it always used to be, so gathering and loading was a major chore.  Needless to say, by Thursday PM I was wiped out and spent Friday and Saturday in quite a bit of pain.  Did I remember to take my meds for my leg spasms?  NO.  Did I remember my Tylenol PM so I could sleep at night even tho I couldn't get comfortable?? NO.  What an idiot.  Deb found some Tylenol PM, so that I did get some decent sleep Saturday PM.  I should have driven home for the other meds, but it {like everything else at that point} seemed like too much effort.  But that's enough bitching. 

Well, maybe not.  Wednesday PM, after having helped the farrier for about an hour and a half  that AM, Chuck and I pulled over 40 Seed Ticks off me. They were everywhere.  The big ticks don't bother me, but the Seed Tick bites itch and fester like fire ant bites and those have been driving me nuts.  We treat our yard, but in thinking back, the farrier set up his stuff off to the other side of the pasture, where no one ever really goes and apparently Chuck doesn't treat.  After he was done helping me "tick pick", he went right out and sprayed the horses.  If I got so many, imagine what they had going on!!!  Poor girls :(

Putting my 'discomfort' aside, it was a great weekend!  We're gonna go again a time or 2 before it gets to be too cold for these Southerners.  LOL  I'll just do things a bit different and be better prepared.  That, and leave more stuff for Chuck to do, like he told me to, to begin with.  Just gotta learn to listen!

Blogrolls, Happy Horses and Progress

So how do you feel about Blogrolls??  I have asked this before and many of you like them because it provides you with an easy link to other bloggers, as well as a means to discover some new reads.  I like them for that reason, as well.  Typically I will read someone's blog if I see them leave interesting comments and check them out via the comment.

But what if......someone has a blogroll and it is quite obvious that they keep it updated, because you see new names go up and others go off, rather frequently.........but you're not on it.  Maybe it's someone that you have been blog buds with since you began blogging and you have had your ups and downs with thru the years, but thought all was well.  How much time should pass before it really hurts your feelings?

I can be......okay, I AM a rather controversial person and I don't blame some folks for not reading me.  But then again, I don't write like I used to.  Subject manner has drastically changed, which no doubt turned some away, cuz they like dirt.  Sometimes, I really feel that because of past 'issues' and the fact that they were so verbal and public about it, they are literally ashamed to have "Yankee Chick" in their blogroll!  Some of these folks still read me and I them and comments are left by both.  So, I don't get it.

Personally, I took my blogroll down the other day.  I have always liked having one because I like for people to have access to some of the cool blogs I read and to see who our mutual reads might be, and so forth.  But, in light of a recent 'dust up' (a phrase I loathe, but seems appropriate since it wasn't really a 'flame war') I decided to take it down until I do some reorganizing.  There is no point in having blogs listed that you: 1) no longer read. 2) no longer want to refer your friends to or 3) have no desire to be connected to.
So, yeah.....I guess I will now be one of those that just might fall into the category of being ashamed to have people on my blogroll as I wouldn't care for some of my readers to stumble upon some of their postings.  (Cuz I'm so fu%&*ng perfect, dontchaknow!!)

In other news, the farrier was here this AM and fixed sweet little Dixie's feet up again.  He was very impressed with how well she is going and didn't expect her progress to be as far advanced as it it.  Since he hasn't seen her for 3 weeks, he could also see that she is, indeed, losing weight and said that whatever we are doing, keep it up cuz she's doing great!  Susie got a 'manicure' and new shoes today and she is all frisky and happy, too.  

Only problem is, I thought he was coming tonight, not this AM, so my freshly showered self is now covered with horse kiss slobber and sweat.  Gotta help catch them and hold them, ya know.  I'm just glad I was able to help. This is how I realize the progress I am making since my surgery....by realizing that I have just done something that I wasn't able to do a month ago or 6 months ago or even a year ago!  I love it.  Even 3 weeks ago, I wouldn't even have attempted to go out in the pasture and try to catch Susie, let alone put a lead on her and walk her out to his truck.  Yes....walking out and back and following her around hurt a bit, but certainly not enough to stop me!  And leading her with her lead rope, tugging on her resisting self, didn't seem to strain my back muscles.  It's all good.  Damn good!!